The ideal in sex is that both the loversshould experience the highest peak of sensation simultaneously. Rhythmic strokes and deep breathing. like deep diving, \cad the swimmers in the Sea of Sex to the Rainbow Island of momentary but the most momentous merriment. Fully abandoning themselves to the exciting experience the lovers share the supreme moment. If the love is true, the communion of body and soul is complete.
The desire for union should be mutual to yie1d the hest fruits of the best children. Sexual intercourse should be saved from the deadly hand of dullness. Variety should he found, discovered or invented. Approach should be unconventional. The more imaginative the methods, the more exquisite the pleasure.
How Often
Says Dr. R. Swaroop, M.B.,B.S.: "The question of how often connection should occur is one which is discussed in practical1y every book on popular sex educe1tion. One man wanted to know if twice a month was too often at the age of forty-five, while another asked if it would harm him to have union twice in one day. These are typical queries and they both show one thing-fear. Men are always wondering if any harm will ensure if they use sex according to their
desires. The fact is that there will be no il1 effects. The answer to the eternal question of . How often?' is, therefore. that when desire is mutual it should be satisfied. For some healthy lovers, this may mean sexual union once a" week or even once a month; for others, perhaps half a dozen times in a certain week. Al1 men and women differ sexually and there are no rules in their personal matter. Each must be guided by individual needs and find the happy medium. The only point to remember is that when fully satisfied the couple should rest; for a second sex act is more fatiguing when it follows immediately upon the first. The sexual appetite should be regarded in the same way as the appetite for food. When one has a great meal. one does not require another until hunger returns. If one has eaten heavily, a longer interval between meals is required, but by no stretch of imagination could one he considered to have harmed health permanently. And it is the same with sex. Do not worry about the number of unions which take place, but be guided by natural instincts and needs."
Sex becomes harmful when it is downgraded to sheer lust and sex-starvation. Then the lovers are forced to adopt all types of mechanical gadgets for artificial self-stimulation. Those drugged with lust can be wretched as those drugged with liquor.
"No one denies that the chief end of sex is reproduction of the species, but everything which has an end, also has a beginning and a middle. In this case the beginning and the middle of sex are the expression of love and the giving and receiving of pleasure . Thus the children of a union are the product of love, and not the cause of it''.
General1y, the reproductive life of a nun starts from the age of 17 and ends at 60 and that of a woman ranges from 15 to 45. There may be however, be many exceptions till the above ages may he taken as approximate in the case of the majority of men and women. As has been described earlier, during this period the testicles in the man produce spermatozoa while the ovaries in the women produce ova or eggs. It will be interesting to note that while the semen of the male general1y contains millions of microscopic spermatozoa, in the female only one ovum matures in a record of 28 days or one month. Thus, at the time of sexual intercourse millions of these sperms are discharged in the vagina and if only one of these unites with the ovum produced by the ovaries conception takes place. It is, however, not necessary that every sexual intercourse must result in conception as there may be no spermatozoa present in the semen discharged by the man or there may be no ovum awaiting the arrival of spermatozoa. Besides in some cases certain vaginal and other conditions may render conception unlikely, flow ever, if there is no permanent defect in the husband and the wife. conception does take place sooner or laier. As the new life is always the result of the union between a spermatozoon (or a sperm) and an ovum, it would be desirable to state here some more facts about these .
Spermatozoa : Sperms
As has been described earlier, the function of the testicles in the man is to produce semen. The semen ie a thick and somewhat milky liquid with a characteristic odour. The two main constituents of the semen are the sperms 'and a mucous fluid including some seminal fluids from other glands. The sperms cannot be seen by the naked eye. They can be seen actively moving in a countless number if a drop of semen is examined under a microscope as illustrated in the first chapter. Each sperm is an individual entity end when seen under a very powerful microscope, i.e.. in a highly magnified condition, it will be observed that it consists of three distinct parts; egg-shaped head, an intermedi:1te segment called the body, and a long tail. It is by means of the tail that the sperm moves forward in the seminal fluid. So long as the sperms remain in the testicles, they cannot move and are inert. They get motility by mixing up with seminal fluids from the seminal vesicles and the prostate gland. The mixture is called semen. The sperms retain this motility in the vagina and can remain alive there for about a week. When the semen is discharged in the vagina at the mouth of the uterus, millions of the spermatozoa begin to move towards the cavity of the uterus very slowly. Each of these sperms is capable of impregnating t he ovum and only one of them performs this function. The remaining sperm" are no longer of any use and perish.
Ova or eggs
As has already been stated, every healthy woman possesses two ovaries, one lying on the right and the other on the left side of uterus, in the abdominal cavity, At the approach of puberty, the ovaries grow rapidly and assume their normal shape and size. Before that, they are rudimentary in form. Appearance
of the hair in public region at puberty is the first indication for their growth in a girl. Soon thereafter starts the process of menstruation which indicates that the ovaries have started their function of producing ova. The production of ova which begins at puberty continues for a period of about thirty years. This, however, stops during pregnancy and lactation.
It has been explained earlier that ova develop from cells which originate in ovaries. Normally, once ovum ripens in a period of four weeks alternately in each ovary. When the graafian surrounding the ovum breaks, the ovum shed by the ovary is picked up by the claw like fringe of the fallopian tube through which it is pushed towards the uterus. After having reached the uterus, the ovum remains there for about a fortnight. It is not impregnated by a sperm during this period, it leaves the uterus and passes out of the woman's body through her vagina.
An ovum is much larger than a spermatozoon. It is like a small dot, just visible to the naked eye. It is a spherical mass of protoplasm with nucleus somewhere near the centre. It is surrounded by a cell wall which has extremely small pores and canals. It is through these pores that the spermatozoa enter the ovum to reach the nucleus, and if the ovum is fertilized, it gets nourishment through these pores.
Sperm-Ovum-Union
We have already seen that at the time of sexual intercourse the semen discharged in the vagina, on and, in front of the mouth of the uterus, and thus millions of spermatozoa reach the vagina. From the vagina they make their way through the cervix into the uterus; on many occasions they even move up to the
fallopian tubes. It is generally in the fallopian tubes that a sperm meets the Ovum and impregnates it and the fertilized ovum usually develops in the uterus.
In most cases, the impregnated Ovum travels down into the uterus and soon establishes contact with the woman's blood circulation which supplies nourishment required for its development into a baby. This contact is made through the uterine mucous membrane. Before describing in detail the developments of the impregnated ovum, it seems advisable to tell the reader the reason for multiple births i.e., birth of twins, triples, etc., and also something about extra-uterine pregnancy.
Multiple Births
As has been explained earlier, Usually a graafian follicle contains one ovum which again has a single nucleus. However, in some very rare causes, two or more ova arc discharged at the bursting of a single follicle or one ovum contains two nuclei. Obviously, if two or more ova arc discharged by n single
follicle and all of them get fertilized, multiple births take place. As the Ova are impregnated by different sperms, the sex and appearance of the children thus born ma be different. Twins arc also born when two nuclei are present in one ovum, and both of them are fertilized by the same sperm. In this case, as both come from the union of the same egg and the same sperm, they generally have the same sex and features,
Extra-uterine Pregnancy
Normally, and most frequently, the impregnated ovum lodges itself in the uterus. However, there are not infrequent exceptions to this rule and in certain cases it may lodge itself on the ovary or in one of the follopian tubes or even in some part of the abdomen. This is called extra-uterine pregnancy-ovarian, tubal and abdominal respectively. In view of the unnatural surroundings, the impregnated ovum dies soon but, if it keeps on developing it may endanger the expectant mother's life. Such cases should, therefore, as soon as they are detected, be reported to the medical authorities who will remove the irregular formations by means of surgical operation.
Development of Impregnated Ovum
The impregnated human egg in the uterus starts growing immediately and evel1 in a period of three days after impregnation it becomes large enough to be easily seen by the naked eye. It develops into a full baby in a period of 280 days. During the first three to four months the impregnated ovum is known us embryo. Thereafter, it assumes a definite shape of a baby and is ca1led 'foetus'.
During the first few weeks, the growth of the embryo ie extremely rapid. In the second week, the weight of embryo is one grain and its length reaches the fourteenth part of an inch. By the end of the first month, it becomes about half an inch long and looks as large as a bee. During the first half of the second month, the rudiments of the spine, the heart, -the head and arms and legs become distinguishable. Then, small signs of nose, mouth, car, eyes, etc., appear and the weight increases. Its length at the end of second month is about one and a half inches but it is not possible to ascertain the sex at this stage. The sex becomes apparent at the end of the third month or the beginning of the fourth month. During the third month, formation of very soft bones takes place. The arms, legs, fingers and toes come out. The embryo takes a definite shape and is called 'foetus'. It is about three inches in length at this stage. As already stated, the sex is also established by the end of this month or the beginning of the next month. During the fourth and the fifth months, the foetus increases in size.. Its length becomes eight to ten inches and its weight is about ten ounces. The foetus also becomes very active and begins to move. Its movements are felt by the mother. In ,the sixth month, its length and weight become about twelve inches and one pound respectively. During the seventh month all parts are completed and it is twelve to fifteen inches long a and weighs about three to five pounds. Sometimes the baby is born during this month, but is very weak and delicate. However, it can live and have normal health if kept and nourished with great care. By the ninth month, i.e.. its full term of 280 days, it attains full perfection and measures from sixteen to twenty-four inches and weighs from six to nine pound. At this stage, the baby is expelled under the pressure of uterine contractions, the details of which will be described later.
Pacenta and Umbilical Cord
When the impregnated ovum reaches the uterus, a solid mass consisting of blood vessels is formed on the walls of the uterus. This mass is called placenta. It grows steadily and assumes the shape of a disc about one and a half inches in diameter. During gestation, i.e., the period between conception and birth, one side of the placenta adheres to the inner walls of uterus while the other side is connected with the foetus vessels by means of a lube containing umbilical blood vessels. This tube is called the umbilical cord or the cord. The nourishment and oxygen furnished by the mother are brought. to the foetus through this cord which also brings back the waste matter. After the birth of baby the placenta is detached from the wall of the uterus and is driven out through the vagina under pressure of uterine contractions.
Changes During Pregnancy
At the time of the growth of the embryo in the uterus, many changes take place in the woman's body. When the impregnated ovum had lodged itself in the uterus, the ovaries suspend the function of maturing ova and thus the process of menstruation is also suspended may, however, be stated here that, though menstruation stops during pregnancy, its absence should not always be taken as a proof of conception having taken place, as it sometimes also stops because of certain other defects in the woman's body.
During pregnancy, the breasts of the woman swell and become firm and somewhat hard. The nipples enlarge and their '.shade and that of the spherical portion surrounding them becomes darker. It is always better. to support the heavy breasts during pregnancy by means of a well-fitting brassiere. In the fourth month and thereafter, a few drops of milk can be squeezed out if some pressure is put on the breasts.
After conception the abdomen of the woman gradually increases in size and she puts on weight. This is due to the fact that the volume of the uterus increases with that of the foetus. The other organs in the abdomen "re pushed upwards and sideways and the abdomen begins to bulge out. This pressure on the organs in the abdominal cavity leads to certain troubles in her respiratory and digestive systems. That is why during the first few months of pregnancy I she has loss of appetite, occasional constipation and also experiences vomiting. Sometimes during the first few weeks, she gets vomiting immediately after she has taken something. The disorders should not be much worried about as pregnancy is not an illness. Some depressions like long lines appear on the lower part of the abdomen and also some discoloured patches on the 'groins, i.e., portions between the belly and the thighs. Though these lines and patches fade after the birth of the baby, their traces can easily be observed even thereafter.
Due to the enlarged uterus, there is a great pressure on the urinary bladder and the woman has to pass urine very frequently. The colour of vulva also becomes deeper during pregnancy.
The pregnant woman usually feels an irresistible desire for certain special foods and drinks. Sometimes she even craves for certain extraordinary substances which a person in normal state of health would never dream of eating. .Thus, in many cases, you will find the pregnant woman taking clay, charcoal, chalk, sand and blotting paper. These cravings of the pregnant women differ to such a great extent that it is not possible to draw a list of the articles. Some long for sweets and fruit, while others desire pepper. pickles and other sour ea tables, I t has not been possible so far to determine the exact causes for the cravings. There arc no doubt a few theories;
but none of them is quite satisfactory.
Hygienic Precautions
As h.15 been described earlier, the woman is likely to have certain disorders of digestion during the first few months of pregnancy. Moreover the mineral elements, mainly iron and calcium, arc very much needed for the development of the foetus in the uterus. The pregnant woman should therefore have light diet which can be easily digests and which contains iron and calcium. She should have milk, butter, fresh green vegetables and fruit frequently and in good quantities. This wilt not only help her in supplying the requisite nourishment to the foetus, but will also avoid constipation. If, however, a pregnant woman suffers from constipation, she should not use very strong purgatives but should have only 8 mild laxative. The pregnant woman should also get her urine tested regularly so that it does not contain large quantities of albumin. She should also not take big quantities of such diet as contains albumen. If she" has to pass small quantities of urine very frequently, she should take barley water.
The pregnant woman should not use very tight fitting garments. Her clothes should be light and loose. The breasts should be supported with a pair of brassieres. All constrictions' must be avoided.
She should not run, jump or lift heavy weights as this sometimes leads to abortion. She should also not pull anything towards herself with great force and should always go upstairs very slowly. All such movements as put a pressure on the uterus should be avoided. She should not do a any heavy work and should stop working before she begins to feel tired. She must have walk in the open air every day so that she acts enough supply of oxygen needed for herself and the - baby.
Above all, she must remain happy nn4 have high and pious thoughts. The husband should rather take care that she does not remain worried or angry on any account during pregnancy as the thoughts of the pregnant woman have their effect on the child in the uterus.
The pregnant woman should periodical1y get herself examined by an -experienced lady doctor. This will avoid the occurrence of any complications at later stages. If, however, a pregnant woman falls ill. she should be treated very carefully and the doctor should be informed that she is pregnant.
Sexual Intercourse during Pregnancy
There is a difference of opinion amongst sexologists on the question of having intercourse during pregnancy. Some hold the view that sexual intercourse during pregnancy is very harmful to the expectant mother and the coming child and that the uterine contractions which accompany coitus may also provoke a miscarriage. According to them, sexual intercourse should be avoided through the entire period of pregnancy at all costs. Other sexologists who are in a majority, are of the view that sexual intercourse, if performed in a certain manner, during the first five or six months of pregnancy does not do any harm to the woman. . In many cases. the women have mort desire for and derive more pleasure from the sexual union during pregnancy. This is because previously the fear of pregnancy prevented them from giving way to their natural desire for sexual enjoyment, but after conception no such fear exists. On
She must be given complete rest during the last two months of pregnancy and also for at least two months after the delivery. Sex relations must be entirely suspended during this period the other hand, if the husband is separated sexually from his wife for months, he does not get from her the satisfaction that he desires and might even like to go elsewhere for fulfilling his desire.
The sexual act may, .therefore, be performed . during the first six to seven months of pregnancy, provided the following precautions are observed :
1.
2. The man should be very careful to see that no pressure is put on her stomach and pubic region. He may support his body on his arms during the first few months. But, after the third month, the normal man-superior position should be changed to woman superior position or to the posterior. lateral position, i.e., the woman lying on her side with back towards the man. These have been described in the chapter on 'Sexual Union'.
3. During pregnancy, the sexual "
4. She must be given complete rest during the last two months of pregnancy and also for a at least two months after the delivery. Sex relations must be entirely suspended during this period.
Birth of a Baby
Though delivery is a very 'vast subject that cannot be discussed in detail within the scope of this book, yet it seems necessary to give some general information about it in a book like this. When the child has completed its full term of 280 days in the uterus, the muscles of the uterus begin to contract and the uterine contractions enable the child to come out through the vagina. These contractions take place occasionally during the period fifteen to twenty days before the delivery. At first. the contractions are slight and cause a little pain. But at the time. ,of delivery, they become more and more frequent and violent, and the cervix comes down to the vagina. The woman also takes efforts to contract the already dominal muscles to enable the uterus to expel its contents. The bag of water bursts and this pushes the head of the baby to the vulva. The vu1va also expands and further efforts and' uterine contractions enable the head and neck to come out. There is then a brief pause. With the next contractions comes out the baby. The woman now feds immense relief. Usually, as soon as the baby comes out, it cries, which is Ii sign of its having begun to breathe. Even though the baby has come out, it remains connected with the women through the umbilical cord. The cord is cut and tied by a string by the mid-wife or the lady doctor who is in attendance on the woman. After about half an hour-sometimes an hour or more,-further uterine contractions take place and detach the placenta from the walls of the uterus. The placenta is thus driven out with the cord through the vagina. This completes the delivery which lasts from fifteen to twenty hours if it is the first delivery. If the woman has already borne children, the time taken is generally much less-say, four to eight hours.
Care after Child-birth
In many cases, particularly after the first delivery, the vaginal opening gets cuts. These should be got stitched by an experienced lady doctor immediately. If there are my complications, the doctor or nurse attending the case will themselves look into. However if the doctor is not available at the time of the delivery, the woman should be got examined by the doctor even after child. birth to make sure that there is no complication. Lack of space does net permit the description of various possible complications.
Care in Child Bed
After the cord has been tied and cut the child begins its independent life. The woman had awaited this moment anxiously for nine'" long months while she carried her child in the uterus. She should be given something warm to drink and left to take rest. As regards the period for which the woman should re main' in bed after child-birth, customs of different people vary very widely. From the physiological point of view, the woman should remain in bed till her genital organs have returned to their normal state and have regained their strength. This normally takes a period of five to seven weeks. The woman who gets up too soon after her confinement runs the risk of getting one or the other complication, e.g., displacement or prolapsus of uterus. The strain of labour exhausts the woman's system and, moreover, she has to feed the baby with her milk. She must, therefore, be given complete rest and nutritious diet. She should take plenty of milk, ghee or butter,cheese, green vegetables, fruit and' other such eatables as are easily digestible. During this period i. e., unless the genitals of the woman have returned to their normal state and have regained their strel1gth, the sexual acts must not be performed. The conjugal relation had better be resumed only after the re-appearance of menstruation. Generally, the process of menstruation reappears in a period of two to three months but in certain cases it takes from four to six months or even more. Even if she makes satisfactory progress during confinement, she must be got examined by a doctor periodically, say, once in ten days or so.
Feeding the Baby
The baby's natural food is mother's milk. This is its best diet. Though there are some substitutes for it, none equals it. The baby should not be given mother's milk immediately after birth. During the first ten to twelve hours, the baby may be given a little quantity of fresh water sweetened with sugar or glucose. It docs not need any food during this period. While nursing the baby regularity should be observed. Some mothers breast-feed their babies as and when they cry. This has harmful effects on the mother and the child who begins to suffer from indigestion. . So, she must observe regularity for this purpose and may feed the baby after every
Proper care should also be taken that the baby and its mother get plenty of fresh air and natural light. The room occupied by them must be kept very clean and free from flies, mosquitoes, insects, etc. The baby's body should occasionally be massaged with pure butter or ghee or mustard oil and it should be given a bath daily-with hot or cold water, according to the season. Its dress should be absolutely clean and quite loose.
